Today, We Are All Dukies

After our brief interlude with basketball failures in drawing, we now return you to the regularly-scheduled programming of a "Heismanhopeful " throwing 4 interceptions and the football team being Duke's first ranked away victim since 1971.

 

You have to be happy for Duke, just look at those adorable nerds celebrate.

Win, Lose (a lot), or Draw

The ACC media day had players and coaches trying to draw their mascots. The results (like Jokie basketball in 2012-2013) really speak for themselves.

Look, we all know the Hokie is a made-up mascot, and a poor one at that, but if you're the head coach, you should at least know what it looks like. Coach, I award you no points, we are all dumber for having looked, and may God have mercy on your soul...
 

Meanwhile, we think Ben Emelogu's Jokie bird has had one too many tacos at the dining hall...that's the only way to explain both the size of the bird and the lines coming out of his ass....
 

Marcus Vick Likely Out For Sunday

Everyone update your fantasy fast food teams, Marcus is out for Sunday. This piece by the Onion is made even more hilarious since it's so close to reality.

http://www.theonion.com/articles/marcus-vick-likely-out-for-sunday-shift-at-sbarro,34169/

Is the Hokie Football Delusion Contagious?

Basketball player Jalen Hudson committed to the Jokies. To his credit, I guess Blacksburg is better than his other option...Arkansas.

He "[has] aspirations of playing at the next level" (so did Marcus Vick), "[is] also the type that [likes] winning," and most importantly, he wanted to "go somewhere where the coach can really coach the team and get [them] deep into the NCAA Tournament and hopefully win a national championship."

Whoa there tiger, pump the brakes. Someone better tell this kid their basketball team has one Tourney appearance since 1996, and only two in the past 27 years. Win a national championship? Better build another trophy case.

Source: http://virginiatech.rivals.com/content.asp?CID=1557731