Tuesday Update: Seriously, We Weren't Kidding

Seriously, we weren't kidding. The Jokies fans honestly think they've somehow returned to relevance and contention after being the inexplicable bug that escaped Ohio State's windshield.

This is making the rounds all over social media, and they're proud of it:

And oh yeah, they're printing shirts! Rednecks are shelling out $19 to celebrate a September football game:

NATIONAL CHAMPIONS!

The day has come! The day has come! Thank god almighty, the day has come! After waiting for well over a decade, the Jokies can finally lay claim to a moral victory national championship. What's that you say? They just completed a 6-6 regular season and won some afterthought of a bowl game?

Nonsense. When your delusions of grandeur are so great you construct an empty trophy case, you better believe your transitive property game is strong as well.

Jokies beat Ohio State. Ohio State is the national champion. Ipso facto, THE JOKIES ARE THE NATIONAL CHAMPIONS!!!

 

Slap Fight!

Deadspin's headline pretty much sums it up. Two awful 5-6 football teams engaged in a pregame slap fight to determine who gets to represent the bottom tier of the ACC in a Startup.com bowl.

A Date Which Will Live in Infamy

The empty trophy case, and Tech's dream of winning anything of value, is finally over. Replaced with a tacky bird statue.

Yahoo Sports: "And thus the trophy case has sat empty and become a bit of a laughingstock."

But...but...it was our laughingstock. We'll never quit you, empty trophy case.

Is the Hokie Football Delusion Contagious?

Basketball player Jalen Hudson committed to the Jokies. To his credit, I guess Blacksburg is better than his other option...Arkansas.

He "[has] aspirations of playing at the next level" (so did Marcus Vick), "[is] also the type that [likes] winning," and most importantly, he wanted to "go somewhere where the coach can really coach the team and get [them] deep into the NCAA Tournament and hopefully win a national championship."

Whoa there tiger, pump the brakes. Someone better tell this kid their basketball team has one Tourney appearance since 1996, and only two in the past 27 years. Win a national championship? Better build another trophy case.

Source: http://virginiatech.rivals.com/content.asp?CID=1557731

Delusions of Grandeur, Even in the NFL

Don't let graduation stop those delusions of greatness. Former Hokies' running back David Wilson has played in six NFL games, only rushed for 87 yards in six games,  and his most famous moment is crying on national television after an embarassing fumble on his second career carry.

But that won't stop him from building an empty trophy case for that future bust in the Hall of Fame. Next level, baby!

“I think at the end of my career, I’ll be in the Hall of Fame,” the rookie told Newsday, "when I get my opportunity, the sky is not the limit. I think it’s past it."  Yes, that's correct, not only will he be in the Hall, but he will be so incredible he will be in the stratosphere.

Oh yeah, and then he compared himself to birth control. “I’m like birth control,” Wilson said. “You have to believe in me."

Shocking No One. Tech Does Not Contend for Titles.

Today, in Stewart Mandel's College Football Mailbag on Sports Illustrated's website, he got a simple question that Hokies have been delusional in answering for years. What does someone outside the maroon cult think? Well, it turns out he thinks the same thing we all do.


Question:

So, with Virginia Tech's annual failure to live up to its ranking, is anyone going to admit that perhaps VT isn't really an elite program? Perhaps writers just like Frank Beamer too much and keep fooling themselves into thinking that VT is an elite program.

Answer Excerpt:

As for whether Virginia Tech is an elite program -- what, may I ask, is your definition of elite? If it's a program that regularly contends for national titles, then no,
Virginia Tech is not elite. 

Read more:  http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/2012/writers/stewart_mandel/09/19/alabama-lsu-national-title-contenders/index.html#ixzz271ETiHo0

If We Build It, Trophy Will Come!!!

“ There’s a danger in having a case reserved for the spoils of winning it all. As the years pile up and the title trophies don’t, the powerful symbol can become a painful albatross. ”

~ HamptonRoads.com ^(link)

“I feel disrespected every day when I look at it,” he said. “I might see dust on it. I take that personal.”

~ DE Jason Worilds ^(link)